As some may know, Joyce is busy at the Melaka rave this weekend… Drinking beer and dancing her little self senselessly under the excuse of going there for…’work’.. ๐
Since I didn’t go, (due to an exam the following Monday, and again…. I’ve done fuck all.) Joyce had requested that I ‘guest blogged’ for her while she’s there partying..
So yes,…where to begin?
As much as I like to ramble on and on about myself and how truely magnificent and god-like I am.. that would be rather inapropriate,.. its like placing my huge-ass tennis trophy on somebody else’s living room, with a picture of me garcefully hitting a tennis ball.. So yeah, not gonna do that.
I think I’ll just ramble a few thoughts about Joyce…since afterall. this is her little playground! ๐
Joyce is the coolest Auntie I’ve ever met!! Most of the aunties I know play mahjong and watch ‘wah lai toi’ from morning till late, but Joyce here…. she’s surprisingly hip! haahahaha..
I once asked my dad when I was a little naive boy (still am)… I said..
Me: Daddy, are fairies real?
Dad: Of course not la dummy, unless you’re referring to those uncles that are softies”
Obviously i didn’t know what he meant, but even as my maturity and brain became more and more powerful in time.. I eventually knew..
However.. my father’s words of wisdom had always stuck with me.
So when one day, Adam told me..
“Dude, I’ve got a new girlfriend”
Me: really? how’s she like..?
Adam: She’s like a fairy I’ve always wanted…
Me:Ahhhh………..I………seee…
haha… But jokes aside.. I think Joyce is alright.. She cooks wonderful pre-made pasta, she lets me raid the fridge and serves me alcohol whenever I go over to play video games… and of course.. talking to her surprisingly does not make me feel ancient at all.. ๐
I think Joyce is an excellent role model for kids… (my age and below).. lol…
Come back in one piece, you still have to bring me for ZoukOut.
p.s: I’ve been nice… so no fatty pictures of me aight?
Well, you all already know how much i adore TL Just two weeks ago, yet *another* girl friend of mine mentioned, “Hey… i find TL quite cute… nice to talk to somemore…”
So i told another girl about it, “Eh. ———- also thinks TL is cute leh. You have competition, haha!” “Hmm.” Females are so monosyllable in envious times
Anyway, We’re so blessed to have you living with us
We love you long time!
I can never look as cool as you in shades. Ever.
*
A Whole
Vomit Of Pix
I don’t know, most people hated me with red lipstick I don’t see what’s the problem ‘cos its not going to come off as long as Smellie isn’t out with me to smooch
Some ass even tried to wipe it off with his hand *cough*KeithRaymond*cough* Whereupon i got my revenge when he dropped me home… by planting a huge kiss on his cheek
I turned my back and bounced through the lift doors Leaving the despised bright red lip marks on his cheek with him going “Joyceeeee!!!” while wiping it off exasperatedly
*
Speaking of red Here’s the cut i got earlier this week
Blur picture due to disabled picture-taking shivering
*
You Can Lick Me Up, I Promise.
Well, not *me* per se… But something equally delish, nonetheless
So now you can drink a cocktail named after me! Invented by KrazyKatKyan, there was Version 1, then now Version 2
K2Kyan said it’ll be around RM28-32 Cos it’s got lots of alco in it I wonder why
So it’s blue. Strong. And expensive mwahaha… Eh wait, i’m not saying i’m expensive … but i’m not cheap also la
a: 61-2, Jalan Bangkung, Bukit Bandaraya, Bangsar, Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia t/f: +603.2093.8842 e:info@attickl.com i:www.attickl.com
*
“Can you, like, not* take pictures without telling me first?! I need to get ready and pose!”
*
On that same day, we bumped into Josh and May and my first time meeting their 9-month-old cutiepie
Aren’t his cheeks so nice and fat! Just wanna cubitttttttttt
That also happened to be the day some toddler RAN INTO my leg and knocked himself over Ash said i kicked him
I turned around to see him still sitting on the floor So i walked back, picked him up and placed him on his feet He didn’t utter a word of thank you Not even a squeak His parents were laughing at him from paces away
*
After all that food (BracesAaron helped me scoff the rest of my bangers & mash cos i’s too full from gobbling every different curry available at Gobi’s place earlier), we went to KL for wine
*
AzwinAndy’s Hari Raya open house
Smellie’s big glasses
Azwin, you know i’m your true friend Because i photoshopped all your zits out
Actually. More to – because i don’t want ugly people on my blog HAHAHA Sorry. You’re the only one that had to be enhanced.
Four of us went upstairs to look for Woofy Smellie just wanted to see Azwin’s room… desperately So gay -_- Fai was too lazy to walk up the stairs.
I had heaps of wine with AndrewBNBC and Thresa last night Pottered home tipsy and guess what i did?
…
… …
I marinated.
I marinated meat. And i have no idea why.
0_o
Now it’s sitting in a bowl in the fridge, mocking me.
Update:
This is hilarious, Smellie called me just now while i was doing work at KLCC “While you were marinating last night, you said ‘This is Ashley and Fai’s recipe!’…” “HAHAHAHA!!! Omg that’s so dumb… i simply made it up… >_<“
Well i’m eating the beef right now I simply marinated it with soy sauce, oyster sauce and lots of black pepper la Even a blind goldfish can do it
On a more exciting note, Andrew’s gonna be a Daddy! I’m so ecstatic and proud for him!
He was coming up with possible baby names I went, “If it’s a girl, you *could* call her Joyce “ Him: “Er… no.” Me: *pout*
I think Joyce is better then the seriously bizarre names he came up with la… Which i won’t write down here In case someone steals your bizarre baby name and you blame me
I went grocery shopping yesterday ‘cos the apartment is badly lacking in everything And i went alone Cos some ass woke up late and couldn’t teman me
I got so much stuff i forgot i couldn’t possibly carry it all myself, what more with my finger So QueenKanch came to my rescue
Me: I’m going to meet up with her at 8, so i’ll call her at 7:15 to wake her up Ash: You crazy or what!?! Me: …
But QueenKanch surprised me a bit, she took only an hour to get ready this time Though i did purposely give her shit “Where are you?! You said you were leaving your house just now, and *now* you’re on the LDP?! My fish is gonna spoil by the time you help me okay -_- “
We had dinner at Kluang Station, which sucked The assam fish gravy sucked. And it was damn oily.
Then we watched Tucker Max John Tucker Must Die Brainless to watch Edit: Haha shit, Ash asked me who’s Tucker Max. Salah concept, oops.
By midnight, we had nothing to do
I didn’t wanna go to Laundry, so i walked waaaay over the other side of the fountain with my cap down “Hey Joyce. Your home!” said Kanch “Stupid.”
Really didn’t know what to do, didn’t want to spend so much money drinking after huge grocery bill
And then a brilliant idea hit me
KinkyPug said he’d be at Attic so i figured before he arrived, Kanch and i would go buy beer at 7-Eleven and tani in Bangkung
Relive old times, yo.
We tani tani tani, then went to Attic where Kyan layaned me and tani-ed He made a drink called KinkyBlueFairy It’s blue. And strong. Like me *flexes muskels* Will post pics up later Then back to Bangkung park and tani-ed somemore
…havent’ you been blogging?” “…. busy la. When i have free time to go out, do you think i’ll stay at home and blog -_- “
What have i been doing…
Well ok i’ll just ramble I’m good at rambling at any rate
Today, i cut my finger. But it wasn’t just a silly little normal cut, oh no, i wish it was. I was washing the dishes and a glass flew up in the air (yeah. it flew up without giving me warning) and upon smashing, it sliced my pinkie
So i gawked at it a bit, as the blood flowed into the sink (how convenient), before putting the finger under a tap. Which was mildly stupid, i feel.
I mean, who the fuck puts a deep cut under the tap? First thing you should do – is stop the bleeding Oh no, not i, oh smart one I held it under the running water. Staring as the reddish liquid ran into the sink. Then i remembered, “Oh shit. This is not right yo.”
Just before that, i had already shouted for Smellie to come save me Save me from a cut? Yeah right Might as well be calling for an alien
As he (Smellie, not an alien) walked into the kitchen, i blared him to hand me some kitchen tissue Boys are so slow in states of emergency -_- Can die
So there i was, not making any noise and being really calm Cos shite, i’m supposed to be all grown up and all, right, can’t bawl and crap
After 10 minutes, “Should i go to a doctor?” i asked dolefully, still being brave “Mmm… we’ll wait 15 minutes and see how it is.” Said he.
See how?! But my finger might possibly have to be amputated!!! i screamed inwardly
The brave grown-up side went, “Right, of course,” really calmly -_- I hate being a grown up I really just want to be able to scream and yell and merajuk when i feel like it Just to get it all out Maybe that’s why children are so happy-go-lucky Cos they let it all out already!
Being gatal, i peeked at the wound to see jagged flesh opening Brutal yet fascinating Disgusting yet amazing So i held paper towels to it as i watched two reruns of SATC Berger was being an ass and broke up on a post-it note. After an hour it was still bleeding 0_o’
Damn headache wei
Rushed to The Curve to do a really short interview with DaphneIking at 4:30 And i felt i really needed the wine to reward myself for being such a brave girl
So i had wine… and beer… and sangria… till 2am When i think of it, more then 9 hours of drinking sounds so… salah But i swear the time flies when you’re having a good time
The only disconcerting occurence was when i met people and they’d shake my hand pretty hard causing me to wince and grin at the same time
See? It’s so much easier being a kid I could just refuse to touch anybody and tell them i worship Monk Yeah, that’s right, that might work …
Last Friday night, i came home to seeTL’s cousin, Kelvin, on the couch It was his once-in-a-while sleepover, after they played PS2 of course Everyone else went to bed but he and i were still very much awake so we spoke for quite a bit till the sun was about to rise He’s much much younger then me So young that i forgot *how* young
I was in the process of lecturing him about drinking and driving – “You really shouldn’t drink and drive. You have no idea how dangerous it is bla bla bla *auntie nagging*…” “We didn’t, we took cab from place to place.” “Oh! *surprised* That’s good…” “Yeah… we can’t drive yet.” “…. …. OH GOD. I forgot how old you are!”
He’s 15 and just finished his PMR. I forgot la okay.
Ok, enough rambling, time to tidur Smellie thinks i’m getting a fever I just think it’s lack of sayang-ing and loss of blood *dramatic*
I’m cooking supper for him now -_-
“I’m injured…*waves hand in his face*…” “… *manja starving face can die*”
Niama… if i don’t do anything then he won’t eat and i’ll be held responsible by his relatives for not taking care of him right! *faints*
I wonder why 
