Breaking my back just to wear your name

Comments (10) La la la

During out of our girlie nights out a few weeks ago, DarlingDhanya was telling us about this guy with magic hands that helped rid the pain in her muscles. We each then poured forth our own bodily problems – aching calves, lower back pains, foot injury, etc.

After one cancellation and many BBMs going back and forth, 3 of us met up in her house last night for this wonderful massage that would help cease our pains starting at the root problem areas.

The man’s name is KK, and he struck me as a healthy-looking man with bright eyes.
Combining trigger point, accupressure and orthopedic massages, he dubs it manipulative massage.

When i arrived, Aps was lying on a blue mat having her turn so i waited for mine next.
As i waited, i told Dhanya how i took 15 minutes to find my car in BSC and how i must be the only person who loses their car in one of the smallest parking lots in KL.

My turn arrived, and KK asked me what my problems are.
I told him that i suffer some pain in my left foot when i walk for long lengths of time, thanks to a fall (off a high heel no less, 2 years ago).
Then i also mentioned my lower back pains that would come and go, and how sometimes, it would be so devastating that i would get whoever was next to me (colleague, boyfriend, tipsy person in pub) to press it sharply to make it go away.

He asked me to stand up in front of me, and looked me up and down before saying i have flat feet.
“Oh, i know, i found that out sometime last year,” i said, thinking back to a Nike event where everyone was discovering how flat-footed they were on this machine.
“That is your main problem, and that is what is causing the pains in your back. Are you clumsy?”
“Yes… Yes i’m very clumsy!” i nodded, thinking of the average number of times per week i knock into a piece of furniture or walk into a stationary object.
“It’s because you’re flat-footed. So you’re not using your natural shock absorbers.”
“You mean there’s a scientific explanation for my clumsiness!” Glee spread across my face.

He started with massaging my feet with sharp strokes under the arch, as to bring it out, i guess.
As he was getting on with it, Dhanya was telling me some story from the sofa and i was half-zoning out because it was SO painful, yet i was trying to listen as to distract myself.
At one point when KK was busy looking down at my feet, i mouthed “OH MY FUCKING GOD” with wide eyes to Dhanya cos i felt like someone was burning my feet off.
Now i understand why Ash was screaming like a little boy when he got his massage months earlier (and vowed never to do it again).

I was asked whether i exercise, to which i hung my head in shame. I love hiking and swimming, but those are things i do on occasion and not regularly.
He pinched the flesh behind my arm, and said i have surprisingly low fat percentage for someone who doesn’t exercise (and who eats so much, i mentally added).

KK moved on to my back after my feet, and i could feel him kneading my muscle strings firmly. It was painful, but i could withstand it and tried not to make any noise.
He told Aps and Dhanya i was ‘hardcore’ -_- but later told me i had a SERIOUS problem with my back, worse than what most people have.
Apparently my muscles deep in my back are all twisted, instead of the usual swelling on the surface that plague the majority.

I told him that i used to wear high heels all the time, till my back started hurting and i decided to give up wearing them all day long.
Cos if it was giving me some health problems, then i really don’t think it’s worth it.
Besides, God must have made us level-footed for a reason. If he wanted girls to appear taller he would have designed our feet with a slanted arch.
It’s just us humans who tend to devise a certain fashion on what is beautiful. -_-

Well, thanks to wearing high heels for extended periods of time, i now have to somehow fix my back before it give me more problems later in life.
KK also said that my back would give me an extremely uncomfortable pregnancy. I didn’t know how to respond to that so i just kept quiet!
He also mentioned that if we do have a habit of crossing our legs, we have to ensure that we balance it out by crossing one and the other equally.

I have dismissed my habit of wearing high heels all day long, and you’ll always find me in flats unless i’m at an event or party (which is usually a couple of hours long).
But i couldn’t help thinking, “First, i spend a ton of money buying all these beautiful high heels that i cannot help myself from, and THEN, i have to pay MORE money to fix a back problem all those high heels have given me!!”

You say life is unfair? I say fashion is unfair.

I think the real reason i’m writing this is to tell all you teens and early 20-somethings that at some point, you really should be thinking of health over vanity.
If i were you, i wouldn’t wear high heels to college/work every single day and fuck my back up later on!

I was having a conversation with my shoes earlier.

I hate you, you know, giving me all these problems!
No… i didn’t mean it, you’re beautiful, i love you!
But still… i have to spend less time with you now, you know that right?

10 Responses to Breaking my back just to wear your name

  1. annna says:

    OH! So that explains the clumsiness! I often got myself knocking on furnitures at home and also tends to hit my foot on anything T_________T

    fashion is unfair! πŸ™ It sux to know that heels looks good on u, but hurt u at the same time.

  2. suraya says:

    Can you recommend that masseur please…

  3. Heya! πŸ™‚

    I’m curious – did he elaborate on why we should cross our legs equally? Cos I usually only cross one side :/

  4. JoyceTheFairy says:

    annna: balance out the time πŸ™‚

    suraya: mmm email me at and i’ll give you his number? not sure how he feels bout it on a public blog!

    the faux fashionista: cos it affects our back (imbalance) when we cross our legs! of course you cross one side… but take turns with the legs πŸ™‚

  5. Martha says:

    Joyce & Ladies,

    This is not SPAM and I’m not some internet troll who’s infiltrated your blog. Just some friendly advice from someone who has “been there, done that” and wants to offer up some friendly woman to woman wisdom.

    I was just blog surfing and found this post. Please, please take care of your backs now while you are still young. I’m 40 something (almost 50 something) and I wore heels throughout my 20’s and early 30’s when I was still (able to be) a cog in the Corporate America Machine. I didn’t even wear them all the time…. Usually just a few hours a day while meeting with clients or for cocktail parties or going out to clubs. Even though I thought I was being prudent, I damaged my back so badly that the doctors have never been able to repair the damage that was done. (I also have flat feet)

    I now live with debilitating pain every single day. And I don’t mean pain that is just annoying. I mean the kind of pain that leaves you unable to work or walk up a flight of stairs or lift things over 10 pounds. And all the massage in the world will not give me my life back. Many women of my generation have had this or something similar happen to them.

    Do not sacrifice your lifetime health for fashion! Please! Especially you, Joyce. That ropey muscle he told you about is something akin to Chronic Myofascial Pain Disease. Please look it up. Trust me. You do not want to end up with my life. Blessings and Peace, Martha

  6. Eunice says:

    I have very flat foot as well. It gives me so much back pain that i used to go to physiotherapist almost every second day for about 3 months.

    But i have gotten better after i saw a podiatry and have foot orthotics made to fix the problem. I have to wear my ugly shoes with foot orthotic fitted in and it squeaks everytime i walk. It’s neither pretty nor fashinable, but i don’t have much pain anymore and get to sleep better at night.

    Also, i have shoulder problems which mean i have to use a backpack rather than nice looking fashinable bags.

    Sometimes i feel that i must be the ugliest woman in the world because i can’t wear heels and use pretty bags. But, will i ever bear the pain in order to look pretty? Hmmm, no. Personally, it is too much pain for me to do so.

  7. Ninie Ahmad says:

    [Do I have to have a ‘This is not a SPAM’ disclaimer like Martha as well? LOL]

    This is not just for Joyce,

    I’m lucky I’m far from having ruined back and I know I’m still young & not fashionable to give advice to you fashionistas (I wear super high heels too πŸ˜‰ though!) but the only way to not damage our priceless backs & posture is – HAVING A STRONG CORE.

    There is (sadly) no shortcut to having a strong core and by emphasizing strong, I don’t mean we need the evidence of 6-pecs. Safe exercises (using body weight i.e OF COURSE Y-O-G-A, Pilates) are highly recommended. Using weights (AND SUPER HIGH HEELS!) if one already has bad posture will only further damage the spine & crush internal organs.

    (Simply holding our stomach contraction when we are standing ON OUR HEELS helps too! Anything that hurts in the beginning is beneficial in the end – and hoooo yeah, anything that [looks] good in the beginning will cost us someday)

    Rest assured when we have the abs SJP & Kim Catrall have – then only our backs are safe. We wanna be wearing heels until we are 60 right? So i-n-v-e-s-t in our abs right now (you and I know how much we spend on our feet!) before it’s too late, girls..

    Love & spine,

  8. […] voice is louder than my Heart’s. But because my entire body is aching and bruised from my 2nd manipulative massage session last […]

  9. […] Have been taking a bigger interest in flats since high heels have betrayed my back. […]

  10. […] begged SpankyCammy to ensure that our massage appointment with KK was taking place on Monday night. I had spent all of Monday holed up at home with the exception of […]

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