A curveball from Life

Comments (10) Emo

Do you remember that blogpost i wrote about whenย Lucas proposed to Helo?
We were all really looking forward to the wedding that was gonna happen on a little island off Terengganu… it was gonna be the wedding of the year (for us)!

Over the past six months,
I followed Helo on a couple of dress-hunting expeditions,
i bought a dress that was the exact tone i wanted according to their theme,
French friends and family flew in from Europe for a few weeks,
the ones in Malaysia all took leave,
we paid for all our rooms rather excitedly so we would be next to each other,
a group of us borrowed an MPV so we could travel together on Friday morning…

Then we read a message on Thursday morning, that Lucas got into a car accident.
At first we all thought it wasn’t serious and wondered on our whatsapp group chat whether the wedding was still going to take place… then as we got bits and bobs of worrying news throughout the day (Thursday was a nail-biting day for everyone, but definitely much worse for Lucas, Helo and the family) we knew for sure on Thursday evening that the wedding wasn’t gonna happen.

We were supposed to leave for Kuantan on Friday morning, and all of us had taken leave,
so instead of moping around at home and staring at our work,
we all went over to Cammy + Kenny’s place to spend time with each other, talk, and make Lucas a giant card.

Saturday was the first time we went to visit him, which is when we heard exactly what happened from him.
This isn’t a blogpost to tell you what a terrible thing happened to them and lament about it.
I really wanted to write this cos i was so shocked and angry at how things turned out after the accident itself.

To start from the beginning, Lucas and his father were gonna drive his MyVi to Kuantan. For the first three hours, Lucas drove. Then they stopped for a coffee and his dad insisted he drive, and Lucas said ok. It was just a VERY bad unlucky thing to happen that his dad fell asleep at the wheel while Lucas was also asleep next to him.

Anyway, the car hit against the divider then rolled multiple times on its side. When it was over, Lucas got out of the upside down car and shouted for his father. All the wedding alcohol that they were carrying in the car had crashed and Lucas was stepping in broken glass… when he looked down he saw that he’d suffered big slashes on his arm… he thought they would have to amputate it cos he said he could see the muscle moving as he breathed. Crazy! I would have fainted… He saw that his dad was still in the car, and somehow… with his injured arm, Lucas managed to bend open the car door with his good arm. I’ve heard of how humans get superhuman strength in times of distress and shock, and this is the first personal friend i know who’s done it. Lucas pulled his dad out to the road, and saw that his father had two big cuts to his head and was bleeding a lot.

Cops came and Lucas borrowed one of their phones to call Helo to tell her what happened. They were on the phone the whole time it took the ambulance to arrive – 40 to 45 minutes. While waiting, Lucas took some shirts to wrap on his father’s head, and was slapping his face to keep him conscious. At the same time, he wanted to grab their passports from the car and asked the policeman to help him – either keep his dad awake or get the passports, but the cop did nothing. I don’t think it’s a matter of miscommunication cos Lucas speaks fantastic English and even some Malay. Clem said maybe the cop isn’t allowed to touch someone who’s hurt, maybe it’s in their protocol or something. Even so, i asked why couldn’t he have helped take the passports from the car? Anyway, we’ll come back to THIS later.

I don’t know how Lucas did it, but somehow he managed to keep on talking to his dad, slap him conscious continuously, talk on the phone to Helo, and grab her wedding dress and his suit. When the ambulance finally came, there was nothing in the ambulance except a hard bed. Not even the mattress type. There wasn’t even a BOTTLE OF WATER. I couldn’t believe it… Not only that, but Lucas told me that he saw the two medical attendants hold TISSUE to his father’s head and was like what the fuck are you guys doing and grabbed more cloth to hold it to the head.

I was just shocked over and over again as he told us what happened. I mean, seriously, even from WATCHING TV you know to hold a cloth to serious bleeding. I hold a cloth to my FINGER when i cut myself in the kitchen! TISSUE?! I don’t know what to say about the medical education in our universities now…

And to think the ambulance didn’t have WATER. Lucas said there was a tap in there, but they told him it was spoilt and there was no water -_- Fuck man. In situations like this it’s a matter of life and death, and the ambulance didn’t even have WATER. WATER. WATER OKAY!!! I am still not over it.

Story not over.

The ambulance took them to Kuantan Hospital, where i heard they were made to wait for a few hours before a doctor attended to them… AGAIN. Matter of life and death anyone?? Helo and Lucas’ mom said how there were flies everywhere in the hospital landing on Lucas’ wound. I still flinch even while typing this. I never knew hospitals outside the city were so impoverished. I somehow assumed every state in Malaysia would have ONE decent hospital?? I guess i’ve just been really IGNORANT.

Helo knew that they weren’t gonna get proper treatment/surgery there, so she arranged for Lucas to be transferred to Prince Court in KL as soon as he could. He finally arrived in KL at night, and had surgery the next morning – 24 hours after the accident took place. The doctor said something that chilled us all to our bones – that the cut missed his artery by 1mm. If it hadn’t, Lucas would have bled out… and as Helo says, he wouldn’t be with us today. HE is so LUCKY!!!

As for his dad, he suffered a brain hemorrhage and had to be stable enough before he was transferred back to KL on Saturday. We saw him on Sunday and the family said he’s already awake and started complaining… meaning he’s fine ๐Ÿ™‚ He still has to do more brain scans tho, so we’re all still asking after him.

But the worst is over. Lucas’ arm is looking ok according to him and Helo. They didn’t want to send pictures and scare us.

We felt so bad for how this had to happen just before their wedding, and what made us even more angry, is the knowledge that they were robbed of EVERYTHING they had in their car.ย From the time the ambulance left the accident scene, to the time the car was ready to be towed, Lucas and Helo estimated a window of 20 minutes. In that little window, all the stuff for the wedding was stolen from the car. Helo went back to look for anything but there was nothing. The only thing left behind was some Vietnamese souvenir and miraculously, a pair of sunnies.

All their luggage with clothes, the groomsmen’s bow ties, the decorations for the wedding they bought from the Philippines (i know there were starfish, #%@* dead starfish also wanna steal!?), the soft drinks, all the cameras and video equipment, even the CARJACK was stolen. Lucas said the last he saw of the car still filled with their things was when the police were there around it, and there were some public on the other side of the highway taking pictures (makes me sick, how can you photograph others’ misfortune?!). So… i don’t know. Why don’t we all come up with our own analysis of how these things all DISAPPEARED.

I am so mad that some people can be so BAD… to STEAL from people when they’re practically dying on the side of the road!!! I NEVER THOUGHT people would stoop to this level! I figured only people in war-torn countries would be this desperate!

… I don’t even know what else to say about it. I just sat here stoning at the laptop not knowing how to continue. I am virtually speechless!

In the BIG PICTURE, we’re happy they’re alive. It’s just such a shit kick in the ass to know all your wedding stuff is ALSO stolen right after you just had a terrible road accident.

After visiting them to hear all the above on Saturday, we all went home with new reminders of what’s important in our lives. I couldn’t stop thinking about how GLAD i am that everyone is safe… everyone is safe, everyone is healthy, nobody’s dying, and THAT’S ALL that matters. It just JOLTED me to REALITY that i have to truly appreciate each day and person. We take life for granted so easily, what with the distraction of work and money and goals, i forget that life is truly about living. Oh man i sound so cliche, but all i can say is that that day, i canceled all my rsvps for fashion week, stayed home with Clem and held him close.


10 Responses to A curveball from Life

  1. bell says:

    hye joyce,

    im sorry for what happened to your beloved friend. just so you know, it is normal to lost your belongings after been into accidents especially car accident.

    my friends have been into car accident recently. all their belongings also lost after been towed. basically the stuff will be gone during the towing. they will took all your stuff first then tow the car later, or tow the car then took the stuff before sending it to workshop/police station.

    sadly to be told, this is our scene. taking advantages on others unfortunate events. so it is very important to call our friends nearby to rescue important stuff because police will only be there to make reports and
    control the traffic.

  2. Kimberlycun says:

    so glad your friends are okay and alive. when my best friend got into a bad accident she was robbed as well while her eye lid has split from hitting the steering wheel and she was bleeding out. it’s fucked up

  3. HHless says:

    My husband experienced the same thing when he met a really bad accident (at the same place where your friend had his). He didn’t even have money to pay a copy of the police report. But we were just thankful that he is OK.

  4. Eve says:

    so sorry to learn what happened and the shittyness of the whole episode..My family friend lost all his cash and rolex while he’s otw to the airport heading for london. He was in coma for the longest time.. Anyway a passerby saw him inside the car wreckage and called for help. so there’s still good people out there…we must have hope

  5. ipohgal says:

    so so glad that your friend lucas and his father made it out of the horrible accident ok. but so not ok for the stealing and appaling lack of help from the police and miserable medical attention. malaysia is in a truly sad state!

  6. grace says:

    omgg i feel sooooo angry reading this. they will have their karma for stealing and not helping. gosh I feel so mad on their behalf!!!

  7. Michelle says:

    Once, I had a vasovagal syncope episode but the ambulance refused to send me to the nearest hospital (less than 1km away!) but they said it was protocol to send me to a public hospital (12km away). It was a matter of life and death, but the health personnel swung open back ambulance door when my mom said to head to the nearest (private) hospital instead. They only agreed to send me to the nearest hospital after she gave them all the $ in her wallet at that very moment as duit kopi for their “violation of procedures”. It is really fucked up how a health personnel weighed me over fucking duit kopi. It’s sickens the pit of my stomach, still.

  8. Chloe says:

    my friend got into a car accident. and he didn’t make it. while he was lying on the road dying, people around him was stealing all his belongings in the car. it sad how malaysia has become. this was in KL.

  9. Clementine says:

    I’m glad to read that your friend and his father are okay.

    It was truly horrendous to know that people would actually steal from a scene of accident, where there are people injured. I hope that karma bites them back one day.

  10. Jem says:

    Hi Joyce, a friend of mine is a pediatrician attached with Hospital Besar in Penang. She lamented the government were slashing funds to improve facilities in her department and this was during the hotly anticipated GE, where they were throwing all that money for corrupt purposes. Made us all sick.

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