The Pretend Beam

Comments (5) La la la

It was windy, as the ledge i was on, was high in the air.

On my left was a massive forest stretched out below.
If i fell, i’d probably break ten bones before hitting the ground in pain.
That is, if i was still alive by then.

On my right, spread the ocean.
Brilliant blue and pretty calm from where i lay.
Then again, i was high up from it, so even if there were wild waves, they’d look tame from here.

I looked down on either side of me – this is amazing!
Everything stretched so far and wide…
Only few have ever witnessed something like this!
I’m so lucky!
I sighed happily and took the whole scene in, basking in the glory of my position.

“What are you doing?” a voice broke my enthusiastic thoughts.
“I’m pretending…”
“… What?”
“I’m pretending.”
“What exactly are you pretending?”
she queried.
“I… nevermind,” I sighed. It would take too long to explain, and balancing on the marvelous beam was quite an effort as it was.
“Why do you have to pretend… there?”

“Well”, i started saying, “We’ve been taking shrooms so much, things aren’t moving anymore. The stones have stopped jumping. But i discovered, the trick is, to observe things from an angle.”
“I see…”
And i could see she was about to laugh at me.
“You’re really trying to squeeze as much out of this, aren’t you?” SpankyCammy stood in front of me.
“Well, yes. There’s no point wasting it. Can you get off my pretend beam?”
“My pretend beam. You’re stepping on my pretend beam.”

She pooh-poohed me, “Oh-kay,” and stood on the grass forest on my left.

“What is your pretend beam?”
“This,” i waved impatiently at the ledge i was lying on. “This is my pretend beam. And you were totally standing on it. How am i to pretend when you’re in the way?”

I tried to go back to my pretending but she still stood there, bitching away about my pretend beam.
I sighed.

“Can’t people pretend in peace anymore?”
“Yes you can, i’m not stopping you, la la la…”

Bitch dipped her feet into the pool sea and started walking all over my pretend beam, leaving wet footprints behind. All over. My pretend beam.

“You bitch!” i half-scolded, half-laughed at her. “Get off my pretend beam! Can’t you go do something somewhere else!!!”
She stopped skipping all over my pretend beam and stared at me, realising i still wasn’t getting up and out of my imagination game.

Out of nowhere, Aps appeared.
“What are you all doing?” she asked as she sat down by the side of the pool on my pretend beam.
“I’m pretending and Cammy’s bothering me,” i replied, “Could you please get off my pretend beam?”
“Yeah, you can’t do anything there. Else she starts bitching,” Cammy offered up to Aps.
Aps promptly jumped up and looked down where she sat, unsure of whether she’d ruined something i had arranged there.

Cammy stood there, exasperated that i didn’t want to entertain her.
“Where’s your camera?” she asked, “I want to take a picture of this MADNESS.”

I laughed so hard i almost fell off my beam.

Behold! The Marvelous Beam!

I got off in the end. She totally spoilt it for me.
Couldn’t stop bitching about it all night though, much to her distress.

5 Responses to The Pretend Beam


  2. Nicole says:

    haha.. this is so cool. You are weird.

  3. viviensiu says:

    the first pic looks like a monorail cat LOL ๐Ÿ˜€

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